Frustration and Jealousy...

Hey everyone who reads this, lets pretend you actually exist.

I'm awake at 6:20am after a night of chilling in the Tv lounge with some people, had my fill in pizza and trying to battle this cold or whatever it is.
I'm sick as a dog but I cant seem to fall asleep.
I even jerked off as usually and it didnt really get me sleeping like I want. What gives?
I have a doctors appointment on monday hopefully I'll get some answers. I've had a fever for the last day or so but its gone down with the Tylenol I've been taking.
I'm basically really frustrated because this sickness has made me skip classes and interrupted my workout agenda. I guess I could use a break from working out anyways.

My jealousy comes from the whole Nicole situation. I really like this girl, she's so awesome, and I keep feeling like I have a chance in the future - which is an aweful feeling because shes been dating a guy since december.
I was recently sitting at lunch with some people and she happened to be sitting with all of them. I sat farther away just so it wouldn't look obvious I was trying to talk to her. I talked to eddy and mingled in the conversations they were all having, I was getting sick during this so I was zoning out a bit as well.
Of couse me being the admirer that I am I totally took a couple of glances at her while she was talking and eating her food. When I look at her I think of how awesome she is and it takes me back to the conversations, or at least the first few that were pretty great.
Here is the kicker - She was listening to someone talk, all the while, she was staring straight at me so when I brought my eyes up I looked straight at her and our eyes locked for a fraction of a second. She got scarred so she looked looked away real fast, but honestly this sounds bad but I've been high off of that moment for this whole week.
I really want her to just dump that immature douchebag she's dating now, and at least get to know me a little. I want to talk to her more, but I also feel like her not being single makes this an ugly situation - I will be friendly but I just dont have the motivation. At least I can enjoy the little things.

On a related note: I really want someone to cuddle with. This is something I've been missing out on for oh so many years and I need to make up for the time that I've lost same thing goes for literature.

Have a good weekend folks.
-Pete